Tuesday 1 February 2011

The Vacuum

19th December

I am as thrilled as a 1950’s house-wife with the new electric vacuum cleaner. It is a nifty little bright red upright model. The maxi-vac is small to store and light-weight to manoeuvre. How does it work? My husband simply lifts the steel deck-board to switch our 240v supply to the larger inverter. Then I vacuum the home with ease and style leaving my headscarf and bright red lipstick intact. The effect does not compare with what I could achieve with a dustpan and brush. It is marvellous darling, divine! My daughter loves it too and cannot wait for her ‘turn’! we have joined the modern age I tell you. I daresay this will catch on.

The second time I used the hoover the baby was terrified of the noise. She worked herself up into a frenzy of red-faced sobbing snot bubbles. Big Sister, traumatised by the baby’s distress is crying too. Their voices are in competition with the noise of the vacuum cleaner. I scoop her up for a cuddle but the baby is inconsolable. The domestic goddess struggles to achieve domestic bliss.

PS. That is not me in the picture above. Picture me more like Audrey Hepburn in a headscarf.

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